Why I exercise

I was lying awake one night a few weeks ago going through my mind how many times I had decided that I was going to take care of myself and live a more healthy life. There are always a ton of reasons to tell myself that I need to eat better, exercise more, cut back on the booze but inevitably I would be on the straight and narrow for about 3 weeks then fall back into my bad habits (no exercise, beer every night, too much cheese). One of the first times I made this commitment to myself was when I was in a horrible relationship and decided that if I could make myself happy and healthy maybe I could fix the relationship. I ran everyday, I stopped drinking and started eating right. All that did was drive a wedge between us; I wanted to exercise and be healthy, he wanted to eat, drink, smoke and be merry. Needless to say, that didn't last long. I spiraled into a horrible year; drinking every day (sometimes drank my dinner), I didn't exercise and when I ate it was horrible for me. Then I moved to Northern California. I got there and saw all of these people exercising. All ages, fitness levels, sizes, etc. I was floored. I had never seen so many people taking care of themselves. I told myself "I can do that". We lived in a beautiful home that had a 8 mile bike path behind it and we would go for a run or bike ride before lunch and then do some arms and belly work before dinner. I looked good, real good. But, as usual, I slid back into my old habits.

Next, we moved to Southern California. If I thought the people up north were fanatics, they were nothing compared to the southerners. I will never forget the day I saw a 30 something woman running, not jogging, running with a dual stroller and the babies couldn't have been more than 2 months old. Not only was she RUNNING, she was going up hill. Up hill for Christ's sake. I felt horrible about myself, looking at this highly motivated person, and I was hungover and getting ready to eat 3 taco's from Taco Bell.

I went back and forth about how to get, and stay, in shape. Some of the things I tried worked, some didn't. I found that consistency is key (my boyfriend would get a huge grin and give me the "told you so" look). I am not one for fad diets or 'get slim quick' pills. All the books are right; exercise and eating in moderation are key. I have been subscribing to Self magazine for about 4 years and one of the services they provide is www.selfdietclub.com. This is an online diary of sorts to track what you eat and your exercise. For me, writing down everything I eat (and I mean everything, even those 2 m&m's count) was eye opening for me. The tool allows you to search a huge database of foods and if what you ate is not in there, you can create your own custom foods and recipes. You put in your height, weight and goals and the tool tells you how many calories you need. You also enter in how active you are and it calculates what your daily intake of carbs, fat and protein are. You can view your eating habits in a graphical format, it is really easy to see where you are eating right and where you aren't. You also track your exercise in the tool. It will calculate how many calories you burned and will show you where you get the most bang for you buck (running a 8 min mile for 25 mins burns more calories than biking at 10mph).

Last summer a friend of mine asked me to participate in a super sprint triathlon for Ovarian Cancer research. I was skeptical at first but was in one of my lulls. I wasn't tracking my meals (b/c quite frankly I didn't want to see how many calories I was consuming). It was exactly what I needed to get going again. I had to get ready for a .24mi swim, 6mi bike and 1.5mi run. I admittedly slacked at first. But about 4 weeks before the event I kicked into gear. I think I trained for the swim 1 time. It was weakest leg and I was avoiding it. I had the bike and the run down. The day of the event came and even though my swim time was slow, I finished in under an hour. It was a whole new high; like one I hadn't felt since using drugs. I was hooked. I immediately felt better and renewed my commitment to myself. I slacked over the holidays but I have been consistently tracking my meals and exercise since February of this year. I did the Pasadena Triathlon (5k run, 15k bike, 150m swim) and I have done a handful of 5k runs. I have lost 8 pounds, my clothes fit again and when I look in the mirror I don't cringe. It has been a great few months. On May 31st I am going to do the Rock and Roll Marathon relay in San Diego. I am so excited.

I found that I have to take this commitment to myself seriously. I have to make time in the day to exercise, even when my work or relationship needs my attention too.

Just some random thoughts on exercise.